Who Are You?

Many of us harbor a belief that we should be who others—society, friends, or our families—expect us to be. How many people choose their professions, pick their spouses, diet to excess, or shape their lives largely in response to external pressure?

These choices often make sense to us. Belonging matters. Approval matters. Aligning with the “shoulds” can feel stabilizing, even reassuring—until it doesn’t.

While living in accordance with expectations can bring a certain kind of satisfaction, more often the “shoulds” become an albatross, keeping us from true fulfillment and success, however we come to define it for ourselves.

When we begin to loosen our grip on external pressures, we start to recognize our own self-worth and our right to make choices that reflect who we actually are. This process is rarely comfortable. It may invite disapproval from others and cause discomfort. But it is also the moment we begin to live with greater honesty and intention.

Marriage has a way of bringing these questions into sharper focus. It tests us in unexpected ways and can force us to confront whether we are truly fulfilled. This is a big, thorny question. It’s not easy to imagine stepping away from a person—or an institution—that promised happiness ever after. Even in painful marriages, people often have thoughtful, well-reasoned justifications for staying.

Whether you are contemplating divorce or already in the midst of one, you will likely face questions about who you are, how you want to handle conflict, and what you want your life to look like on the other side. It’s common to feel unsettled when what you want no longer aligns with what others expect of you.

That’s where I come in.

I support women and men who are navigating the emotional, social, and financial complexities of marriage and divorce. Together, we work toward clarity—at your pace—while reducing unnecessary conflict through clear communication and healthy boundaries.

If you are in the throes of a marital shift, it may be difficult to trust in the possibility of a happier future. That’s understandable. Trusting yourself is a process. Like any muscle, it strengthens with use and the effort often pays off in ways that extend far beyond divorce.